Success: It Is NOT About You!

Perhaps the title of this article is a little deceiving. You might read this and wonder if I know what I am talking about.  I do believe that success is based on personal motivation and individual drive while making the right decisions. Successful people are hard-working and lead effectively through values and goals. 

Yet, I believe we live in a world that is extremely self-centered. Therefore I must conclude that success is not based on you or me. Success is not about you! I believe it is based on recognizing the narcissism that exist all around us.

Let me take time to explain. Psychologist have examined the the American way of life contributes to this issue as a disorder. Many seem to believe that their needs are primary! It is based on individuality and personal choice. Many believe that this has created a generation of very self-oriented people that we might call narcissism. This is a term that is perhaps best described as the need for self though it does take into consideration self-preservation and protection of one’s own property or belonging. 

The term narcissism is basically defined as: “excessive interest in or admiration of oneself and one's physical appearance.” For today’s article I believe that we could expand that definition without redefining its original intent. I think we can see it through the values and actions of individuals.

As long success is only defined as wealth and the gathering of “stuff,” it can result in self-centered, selfish, and “me-first” entitlements. My pushback on this notion Is that we need to understand how successful can be generous. This means that as we achieve, we also understand how to bring others along. 

The impact of narcissism on relationships has a tragic end. Read more.

I believe that the number one topic that most people are interested in is the topic of themselves. How true it is that as you are interacting that people long to talk about themselves and how what they are doing makes a difference. Seldom do you hear anyone stop and ask, how are you today?

Most successful networkers are those that take an interest in others. They have a sincere concern for what other people’s needs are above their own. Just look at the rise of social media which is the exploitation of self. People post about self interest and the majority of selfies are for the sake of getting their portrait on display for others to see, like, or share.

Perhaps the point of this blog entry is just a reminder that we need to be more aware that our success is for the betterment of others. The next time you are contemplating and wondering about your level of self-centeredness, count how often you use the word high or promote your individuality, with its rights and privileges. You may be surprised to realize how important you think you are, in your own eyes.