New in 2019: Yourself.

Makeover. Transform. Renew you! These are the days for renewed interest in personal goals that have the potential of making you new! I love the motivating statement, "Live today in such a way that yesterday becomes jealous." This means making improvements and achieving goals each day! 

Every year everyone has the same opportunity to begin again. Companies use this time of year to start new initiatives. Organizations like churches and other not-for-profit groups are excused to bring a renewed call for change. A new year means that you can take a brief break to review your profit-loss statements, making resolutions that bring improvements. 

We make resolutions when we choose to reform ourselves through simple decisions to act anew. A resolution is a firm (not wishy-washy) decision. 

Let me offer a few suggestions on making resolutions!

1. Keep it simple.

When setting goals it is essential to keep your resolution (s) simple enough to act upon. It is in the little steps that most is accomplished. Too often we want to set big goals and they can be too unmanageable and unattainable. 

By naming your objective in simple terms you can reward your success. This in-turn allows you to reward your success in meaningful ways. In fact, set not only goals but also the rewards for getting there. Attainable goals encourage you to take the next step. If you create complexities in reaching your goals you may bring discouragement upon yourself. Step-by-step, day-by-day, moment-by-moment you will accomplish your goals and achieve more than you thought you could. 

2. Keep smiling.

When I was in high school weights class I made every effort to impress our friends. I was really good at lifting so adding more weights did not have a negative effect on my legs-strengthening routine. I worked my routine with short term power lifting because I was always building up my strength conditioning. Having a bike delivery paper route was my conditioning. I didn’t have much upper-body strength but focusing on my area of strength helped me achieve more. 

The same is also true in setting new goals. If we focus on our area of strength we are more likely to achieve better. In doing this we are able to smile more at our successes because it is less painful than focusing on our failures and weaknesses. By focusing on existing strengths you are able to do more and quickly. 

Achieving goals send a smile to your face! It feels good to reach your objectives. The journey isn’t all that bad either because you set simple objectives, easy to remember and fun to accomplish. 

3. Keep value-centered objectives.

As you set goals and resolutions you should start with your heart first. So often we said arbitrary goals like weight loss or educational goals without considering what we truly value in life. What is it that you like or areas that bring you joy? Start there and you will enjoy your efforts. 

If you start with your values you will find enjoyment in your activity to achieve. For example, if you love family you’ll set goals consistent with building up your family or if education is a value you can make your goal to read just one more book (or whatever it is) to your meet your annual goal. 

As you renew yourself in-keeping with your values, as you lead your company with new objectives, or as you consider your organizational mission and goals, don’t be afraid of shaking up the very core of why you exist. In fact, as you ask why you exist, act on your passion and strengths. 

In 2019, press on to reach your full potential. 

Philippians 3:12 -- (Pressing toward the Goal) I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me.

Don’t be afraid to make resolutions. Everyone should press into their potential by renewing yourself. God has created you with incredible potential. He has gifted you. He has provided you with the ability of creativity. We can never exhaust our ultimate potential in Christ. If we don’t set goals we may plateau and underachieve, settling for average not excellence. 

Keeping your resolutions simple enough to remember and focusing on your strengths as well as keeping them value-centered can help you stay motivated when the going gets rough. Keep it simple, keep smiling, and keep your goals value-centered will combine to increase your success in keeping your resolutions in 2019. 

Christmas Gift - The Joy of Giving & Making An Eternal Difference!

Christmas is that time of year when we are reminded that giving is central to the theme of this special Holiday. Sure, we all love to receive and we look forward to opening special gifts that were purchased with that perfect gift in mind. Today I want to also remind you of how wonderfully generous we can be as we meet the needs of the vulnerable, oppressed, and often forgotten.

I have seen it first hand. Whether it is ringing the Salvation Army Red Kettle Bell or helping to promote the Giving Tree programs at White's Residential and Family Services (White's RFS) or even your favorite church project or favorite charity, it is so very exciting to know that these gifts are making a difference. I like to think that this kind of giving has an eternal perspective that goes beyond just the Christmas Day.

As we give with the intent to make a difference in the life of another, I believe that we touch heaven and our gift has an eternal consequence. It is making a difference in someone else even if they don't realize it or recognize it. What we do here today echoes for eternity!

Last year in particular I purchased a gift for someone that seems to have little or no regard for God's love for her or those around her. I know that what we do for Christ in not in vain. I know that God's Word and His Love doesn't return void.  I purchased a small gift that year for someone that loved art and especially drawing. My goal was to keep this secret and simply pass it onto the parent to give.  My desire was to show God's unconditional Love for her even if I didn't get credit. Even now, I hesitate telling this story but it serves to prove my point.  Even though my gift was anonymous I saw the recipient drawing using the very art set I gave. I can't help but believe that God gave her the gift of art and is using the gift in far more intangible ways.

This year at White's RFS we promote a Giving Tree Project where churches can promote the collection of gifts and even themed baskets for Foster Children and Foster Families. It was a real joy to see how the church people responded to these efforts. Many responded. Two churches that I witnessed up-close were the New Life Church in Kokomo and the Cornerstone Wesleyan Church and their Christian School.

To see the joy on the faces of the staff and in particular the 60 children from the Cornerstone Christian School was remarkable. Their giving to help other children in need beyond themselves was incredible. On of the adult donors told me that she decided to divide her Christmas budget in half so that she could sponsor the needs of foster children. She said, "My grand-kids will understand. After all, they get too much anyways. They will understand." 

Giving when it is in the name of Jesus, no matter the amount of sacrifice or the price of the gift is everlasting. With God little is much!

This is a reminder for us today. As we give we can be assured that it is not in vain. Whether it is to our children, grand-kids, neighbors, or even strangers, God can use these tangible gifts in intangible ways.  It is such a great reminder that is is truly more blessed to give than receive.

Take time right now to think of ways you can give. It may be your time. It may be a few coins. It may even require you write a check or swipe your credit card. Whatever the amount, God can transform this into an eternal difference.

Taking Grand-kids To Breakfast -- What I Learn from Them.

Many weekends we have our grand-kids overnight and we enjoy going to some of our favorite places and share some favorite experiences. Saturday mornings we usually go for breakfast at a local restaurant named Richard’s. Our waitress, Nancy usually knows what we want as we walk into the door. Recently our grand-kids have decided that they want to give the restaurant a new name and give our waitress a nickname. They watch a cartoon called, "Fancy Nancy". This has prompted them to call our waitress by her new name and the restaurant name is now, "Fancy Nancy’s" restaurant.

These and other events are wonderful memories that we hope our grand-kids will keep with them for a long time to come. We started out just wanting to help our grandchildren develop their social aptitude. They used to be shy, especially Jase. These activities helped them to become friendly and now they talk to almost anyone wherever we go. I suppose our next lesson will have to be on setting boundaries because they love to talk.

Kids teach us many things. You know this if you’re a guardian, parent or grandparent. Kids have a way of turning the table on the lessons that we promote. Often, as our grand-kids grow they begin to tell us the difference between right and wrong and remind us of other lessons they have learned.
Our grand-kids are learning like so many other kids the values we hold. We have tried to impress as many lessons as we can but many times they will turn those lessons around on us. Once Ellie told me that I wasn’t listening very well and simply said, "Papaw, you said we should listen. I am talking to you."




The following are a few things that our grand-kids have taught us as we have made every attempt to instill values on them. I truly believe that as you train up a child they will not depart from it even into their adult life.

1. Honesty. (Kids say the darnedest things.)

We’ve often instruct our kids that honesty is always the best policy. They are usually very honest in what they say, and what they repeat hearing us say. Children don’t need to be taught how to lie because it seems as if it is just part of the human nature. As wonderful and delightful as they are we have discovered this far too often. We work hard at helping them to be honest. In the midst of that process sometimes the words and the correction that we share echoes back into our own lives.
I love to tease and tell stories and once Ellie told me that I should tell the truth. Of course, I often tease others and she is finding it hard to know the difference between kidding and being honest. She learns by watching me and I think I need to be a better example. I have learned that integrity is spelled with two eyes!



2. Play. (Crayons & games.)

Seemingly every restaurant has the activity book and crayons to help keep the kids interested. I’ve often learn to play many rounds of connect the dots and Tic-Tac-Toe. How often it is that as we age we also become more serious about work but kids help us to be lighthearted and to enjoy play.
Kids learn to play which teaches them to share, take turns, and keep the rules so that the game fun and fair. These lessons help children to develop healthy understandings of fairness and helpfulness. I am learning that play is just as important as work.

3. Dependence. (Being safe.)

As a parent you can usually see with a different perspective and even the hidden dangers that children often forget. Walking through the parking lot you’re always mindful of the dangers. Meeting strangers is another example of how important it is that your children learn to be careful. Once Jase and Ellie were out on a walk with me and Jase started to cross the street without looking. A truck was nearing our location which caused me to quickly snatch his arm and pull him safely back. It broke Jase’s heart because he didn’t see the danger but only experience my reaction to danger. I tried to explain but all I really could do was hold him and assure him of my love and protective embrace.

I am all too often very independent and self-reliant. There are times when God has to pull me to safety and causing me to question Him. In my independence I try to "go it alone." I am learning that as a child of God I need to depend more on God and not as self-sufficient which sounds a lot like the word selfish.

 

4. Manners. (Be kind and consider others.)

Whether it’s helping children to say things politely or have polite actions, learning manners is a very important social skill. Teaching manners isn’t easy when kids want to have fun, especially when there are two of them competing to get attention. They are naturally self-oriented. Their needs or wants are important and they feel they should come first.

I remember one experience when we took our son Jon with us to a restaurant. It was one of the few times we ate out in a restaurant. He was around three or four years of age. We kept trying to get him to eat his meal but he just wanted to look at everyone around the restaurant. He would try to get their attention. He kept pointing and saying, "People, people." So we told him, "We’re people too!" To our surprise he replied with a look of confusion saying, "You not people!" What I learned that day was the importance of why we teach manners. It has less to do with my behavior and more to do with being courteous to others. Helping children learn proper manners also includes teaching them how to give and care for others. Manners go beyond being polite but modeled after Christ, it teaches others how to love.

5. New experiences are scary. (Learning to trust.)

Every day there are new adventures for our grand-kids. There are so many opportunities to learn and grow. In many cases our grand-kids are adventurous but there are those new experiences that can feel intimidating and scary. Our kids often back away because of fear but we try to help them to trust and to take a risk whether it’s meeting new people or doing new things. Certain fears are healthy like the fear of heights or the fear for your personal safety.

There are far more exciting things that our grand-kids need not be afraid of. They are learning that it’s okay to give a hug to an elderly person or to talk with someone who may be a stranger to them but our friend. As many times as we try to teach them we received just as many reminders to ourselves that new experiences are scary but we can learn to trust. I have also learned from them that the things we fear the most may actually not be frightening after all. Trying new things can be healthy and dispel the FALSE EVIDENCE that APPEARS REAL; making us FEAR what isn’t real.

The Bible has much to say about raising children and perhaps the biggest lesson that could be gained is what Jesus said to a religious leader. He may have even thought that he knew enough as a religious leader yet Nicodemus was reminded that he must receive Jesus as a little child.

John 3:3 -- "Jesus replied, ‘I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.’"

That too is the lesson for us. We must receive the Kingdom of God as a little child because, as we grow older we forget the simple things and the innocence of our youth.