Recently I heard an inspiring message given by Jia Jiang who spoke at the Global Leadership Summit on rejection. His powerful and funny message is so very helpful. Watch his Ted Talk. His talk challenged his listeners to take a dare to be rejected. In doing this we can learn to cope with rejection. I am impressed and inspired so I am creating a few of my own. I call my list, "couragiosity". It is both courageous and curious.
Let me share a few daring efforts I have done over the years. You might call these items "Rejection Therapy with a purpose!"
1. Going to jail and prisons. I’ve come to enjoy the ministry of going beyond prison bars to reach people who are often forgotten.
2. Eating a meal with inmates prepared over prison cell toilet. Others thought I was crazy when I sat down to share a meal at the Chowchilla Correctional facility in California. When I said down with a group of ladies who were sharing their commissary meal together, I decided to join them. While I was eating they told me how the meal was made by gathering together different items and cooking it over an open toilet in their prison cell.
3. Walking into a home of drug dealers. I was used to going into the inner-city to mentor at risk youth. On one such occasion I walked into the house only to be met by quite a few gang members who are sorting out drugs and guns. We scared each other! After I explained that I was a pastor they escorted me to the right home of the at risk youth that I was wanting to meet up with.
4. Having a gun drawn on me. The story will take more time than necessary but let me just simply summarize to say that when you decide to confront somebody for the wrong doing you just never know what could happen. After talking to man out of shooting me I was able to pray with him. Let’s just say that my wife was not too happy when I told her the details.
5. Being a CASA. Thousands of people are court appointed special advocates in the court systems for at-risk children. I’m not that unusual to have been involved in looking out for the needs of children in the court room. I’m on my friends however, very few have participated.
6. Being a foster care parent. Each and every day there are incredible needs of children and youth being placed in Foster Care. While there are risks, There are great rewards. We did foster care for eight years for at-risk youth.
7. Serving the homeless. Connecting one on one with homelessness is something that many people avoid. Over the years I have come to enjoy meeting the needs of such people. You could imagine that many are intimidated by the overwhelming needs.
8. Picking up hitch-hikers. There were many times that I saw this as an opportunity to engage in the relationships of those I provide transportation for. My wife wasn’t always thrilled that I was giving rides to complete strangers and especially having my young children in the car with me. Sometimes taking a risk is rewarding when you think about meeting the needs of others.
9. Ringing the Salvation Army Red Kettle Bell. It really doesn’t sound that difficult yet there are so many who are intimidated by this simple act. You come across a lot of strangers and you gee strange looks yet this is such a worthy cause be involved in.
10. Praying aloud publicly with strangers. Perhaps it’s because I like people that I find it easier than most to chat with complete strangers. Many struggle to develop conversations with them. I’d like to take it one step further and offered to pray for people, even if they are complete strangers. It takes a little bit more boldness to do this but it’s well worth it.
It’s interesting to note that the more times that I practice these habits how much easier it is to do them in the future. The first few times I can recall how uncomfortable I felt but over time I found strategies that made it easier.
Here is my new list of the top 10 risks I plan to take in the coming months. You can call these "Rejection Therapy with a purpose." Or, as I have already said, "couragiosity".
1. Asking a pilot if I can fly their airplane! Besides being afraid of heights and only flown in a small plane one other time, this makes me very nervous. I have flown commercial on large jets with ease. Little pints make me sick. Having the courage to ask a seasoned pilot if I could fly his plane makes me really nervous.
2. Choose to stay the night at a local homeless shelter. Sleeping in the barracks-style dorm with homeless people will take a great deal of courage.
3. Take the challenge from DareMe.com. I can’t wait to take a look at some of the incredible opportunities before me, I dare myself to take a leap
4. Hold up a cardboard sign on the street corner reading, "Give $1 for the homeless!" We’ve all seen them standing outside of the grocery stores in on street corners holding up signs. I wonder what this will feel like!
5. Ask a farmer if I could drive his combine tractor. Driving large farm equipment is very intimidating. Equally intimidating is asking the farmer that you don’t really know if you can drive his farm equipment.
6. Going to my local Dunkin’ Donuts and asking for a free dozen of donuts so that could give them away to patrons in the store. I’m pretty sure they’re asking for donuts will be easy but giving them away to complete strangers may be a little weird.
7. Knocking on several neighborhood doors of complete strangers asking if I could display a yard sign in their yard about foster care.
8. Post on Facebook & other social media asking if people would be willing to ....
9. Ask a police official if they would lock me up in a jail cell for one night.
10. Asking people during church service to write down three items they dare me to do and then do as many as I can - legally!
Taking a dare can be challenging. It stretches your comfort zones and deepens your experiences. I am not always willing to take on new challenges but as I do I find that it gets easier. As I take on the "Rejection Therapy" challenge I want to do it with purpose. The growth I experience will hopefully be a positive experience in others.
