Three Vital Relationships

No one is an island. Any one of our actions makes an impact both positive and negative. Everybody needs somebody who can bring balance and perspective in their lives.

Today I want to focus on three relationships that are vital if we want to maintain a healthy attitude filled with humility in our lives. As we interact with others it is important that we recognize that we need help or support along the way.

No matter the age, young or not-so old, it’s important that we have three types of relationships if we’re going to be successful and relevant. You might say that these are mentoring relationships. In biblical terms, we might call these the Paul, Barnabas, and Timothy's in our lives. Mental health specialist will tell us that it will be important to bring balance so that we do not develop narcissism or isolation.

1. Mentoring someone younger. Each of us have an opportunity to help others in their journey in life. It’s important that we invest ourselves into someone else. Not only keeps us relevant but challenges our way of thinking. Mentor relationships often are those that are vulnerable or at risk youth that need guidance in their lives. I like to think of it as each of us need to be willing to mentor someone who is much younger than ourselves.

I need to be a gap in age in order to have an effective mentoring process. A teenager being mentored by a young adult I even middle aged is very helpful. It is that life experience that can be taught and modeled as well as a grasp on humility and integrity that could be passed on to another generation. 

We might think of this as Paul and Timothy. In biblical terms Paul was an elder giving insight to a younger leader in a related field like pastoring or even business. Every profession needs these type of relationships. 

2. The second relationship is that of a peer, someone close to your age. It’s always a good idea to have an individual that can relate to those things that you are tempted by or trying to seek an understanding with. This is somebody who is of your generation.

A person that is within your generation will understand the times of which we live. But more important is a person that can understand your Temptations and needs. This might be someone who is a part of your social group yet they are someone willing to be honest with you about things they may see you are in need of.

Are you might think of this as someone like Paul and Barnabas. They are someone of equal status in life and perhaps from a similar background and profession. Barnabas was known for being a person who is an encourager but is also someone willing to be confrontational when necessary. Nevertheless, this is someone that can equip you in real time and help sort through related issues. 

3. Choosing an older mentor. The third is necessary the many don’t understand how to develop this kind of a relationship. Let me try to illustrate a little bit. I am midway in my years of life. For the last 25 years or so I have had a friend in my life who is actually 25 years older than myself. This is a senior counsel to me, a mentor that I’m willing to bring insights and suggestions as well as someone I could ask the tough questions. 

I’d like to think of this as the perspective of Timothy with Paul. You see, Timothy was a young man who has been mentored by Paul in his aging years. Timothy was just at the beginning of his ministry while Paul was nearing the end. The amount of advice being offered in this exchange allowed Timothy to further develop and grow in his profession and ministry.

Each of these three relationships are vital if we are going to maintain humility and find success. If we are going to grow and develop professionally and spiritually, these three relationships are very helpful. It requires that we be intentional and building these three relationships indoor lives.

For those who mentor younger people we are able to stay in touch with relevant issues of a next generation. For those days those relationships that are equal to us both in age and profession, it helps to have someone call us out when needed and someone we could talk to about life disappointments and temptations. It is someone who can be honest with us. The third relationship with someone that we choose that is much older than ourselves. It is a senior advisor, one who has greater life experience that our own.

These three relationships create the three strands that are not easily broken as talked about in Proverbs. They build strength as they are interwoven into the fabric of our life. Leave one of these out weekends who we are. The intent is to help us be strong as we carry the load of living in a complex world.