Period - New Paragragh! How Technology Is Impacting Us.

You’ve been there! You get on the phone to make an important phone call only to leave voicemail messages with nearly every call. I hope that people will call me back but it seems as though fewer and fewer people actually will. There’s no question that they receive your voicemail but in this technological age, people seem to be inundated with messages of all types.

So, I make those phone calls and, as is often the case, I forget that I’m leaving a voicemail and think that speaking talk-to-text, my verbal words become odd messages. Just as I come to the conclusion of my message, I will often say, "period" or "new paragraph". Just like that, I want to retract those words because the person hearing that voicemail is undoubtedly going to laugh. Or, at least I hope so. If they could see my face they would undoubtedly see an instant red-faced embarrassment. The emoji would be hilarious.

We are conditioned by the electronic environment. Just as new Apple iPhone is released we recognize that we are far from escaping the use of technology in our every day life. Study, after study seems to indicate that we are never more connected and yet disconnected from one another than we have ever been. We can find ourselves attempting to adapt to the new ways of doing things that is equally limiting our relational well-being.

We are incorporating more and more of technology into our every day life. It’s in everything including our cars, our home appliances, our televisions, our telephones, and, unbelievably, even in our medicines and medical procedures. I read recently that surgeries are now being done by robotic instruments and can be completed by a surgeon hundreds of miles away from the patient.

We are making the excuse that we are more efficient and therefore effective. I have to ask, are we?
Nothing really replaces the human connection. Ever since we were created by a loving God, we become dependent upon that deeply physical, human and interpersonal connection. There’s just something about being human that requires the personal touch and interpersonal connection.

Have you ever been in the room crowded with people and yet feeling all alone? Many do! I remember attending a meeting and having to laugh quietly to myself, because everyone was on their cell phone and no one was interacting with any one else! Though the room was crowded with people and there were plenty of opportunities to interact in a very personal way everyone was on their mobile device!

Studies are showing that with all of this technology, and it is particularly impacting the millennial generation and those younger, that we are forgetting the etiquette of human interaction. Even in the middle of a conversation we are tempted to pull out our cell phones and check for messages. It’s a terrible habit! I know for me, I have tried to form a new discipline of putting away my cell phone when I come home from work. I make every effort to keep my tethering devices away for me so that I can interact "humanly"; that is to be human – like, tethered to people interactions.

I have sat in church and have observed often how many people are on their cell phones, doing all sorts of things instead of interacting with those around them or even the sermon being preached. I too, admittedly, am guilty as well. I once saw someone on their iPad with earbuds in his ears watching a full-length motion picture movie as the pastor spoke. Perhaps he was multitasking but I would bet that he could not pass a written exam about what was shared by the pastor.

Let me share with you four simple words that hopefully, as you incorporate this in your life, you will become much more tethered to human interactions than ever before.


1. Disconnect. Stop what you are doing! Put the phone down. Back away from the screen. Your first step in becoming humanly is to unplug.

You might think that this is simple but it’s not easy. I don’t mean to imply that this is the cure-all to the symptoms that are causing you to feel less human. It’s only one step toward developing personal and human-like. Break away from being conditioned to always think that what is in your hand, that little tool of technology, is your answer to feeling alive.


2. Feel. Second step is to be present; that means to feel. You have seen people who are so caught up with reading their messages that  they have no idea what is happening around them. They are sitting in a crowded café yet all alone in a world of isolation.
In order to feel you’ll have to listen and respond appropriately. You will have to look at somebody in the eye and to feel what they are feeling; to listen to what they are saying. You can’t do that without writing many adjectives to describe what you are attempting to say in print. When you’re in the room, with someone, you will have to feel.


3. Re-engage. The third one makes sense. It’s about plugging into human interaction that is both physical and personal. It is not only setting aside electronic distractions and beginning to feel but it also means to engage with someone. I call it, re-engage.

As you connect with others you are forced to exchange words and ideas. As you interact, you are thinking and feeling your way through a conversation. As you re-engage, you are finding fulfillment in that moment and in that space. There are so many times when we have knowledge of things with very little understanding of how to incorporate that knowledge into our relationships with others. Technology gives us plenty of information but human interaction shows us how to use that information appropriately.


4. Act. What is it that compels you?  What is it that inspires you? What is it that causes you to take action? Recently I was sitting in a meeting with a group of individuals when someone shared a very personal story. It was the kind of story that would cause most people to immediately want to act. Interestingly, however, this group received the information but is if they had no emotional attachment simply dismissed the story and moved onto the next item on the agenda. I observed how many in the room seemed to be remarkably detached from that experience.

The fourth word that we need to understand is the word, act or take action. When we are interacting on a personal level with others and we are engaged in the conversation and we feel, we immediately want to take action. There’s something that is unique about being human that causes us to want to take action. Yet, could it be that because we are receiving so many messages with so much news that we are overwhelming ourselves to the point of becoming fatigued? It seems that in an instant but information will travel to electronic devices like our phones as simply information.

We are wired as human beings to respond to the needs of those around us. It is natural for us to have empathy and to be concerned rather than consumed by the amount of messages that our smart phones can produce.

In my line of work I talk to hundreds of people every month. I am either on the phone or sending emails and text messages and even making personal calls on people at their office. It is becoming much more clear to me that unless I invest myself into a personal relationship with people, that is to be humanly, I will be unable to convince anyone of what I have to offer them. I spoke once to a friend of mine who told me that at his office he receives at least ten interruptions a day from telephone calls to individuals stopping by asking for something. He’s come to a place where he has decided that unless he has a deep concern or interest in there cause or a deep interpersonal connection with the person that he is not likely to respond to their inquiry.

It seems as though everyone has something to sell or information to give rather than a willingness to invest themselves into a relationship that matters.

Since we are on information overload and likely dealing with technology fatigue, we have to disconnect in order to feel again so that we can humanly re-engage that stirs us to action. Ask yourself the following questions and if there is a yes to any one of them, I recommend that you need to take time off from technology.

When you receive bad news over your phone, is it just information to you?

When you are in a personal conversation or in a meeting with colleagues, are you tempted to check your messages on your mobile device?

Do you find it hard to put your phone away or turn it off when you get home?

Do you surf the web or scan your mobile device while in the room with others?

Do you place your phone on the table in front of you while meeting with others?

Do you take phone calls while having a conversation with someone else?

Do you sit in a café looking at your telephone or computer with little interaction with those around
you?

Did you answer yes to any of these questions? How many did you say yes to? The higher the number, the longer you should set technology aside. Technology is merely a tool. In the hand of the builder, you can develop linkage to others; you can regain your status as a human being.